Looking to build trust with a new team member quickly? Then move faster than you usually do to deepen the relationship.
Deepening a work relationship doesn’t mean we become besties with each of our team members. This isn’t about building the type of relationship we have with our friends or our spouses. It does mean that we use what Edgar Schein calls “personization” to move our relationships from transactional to trusting.
Transactional relationships. These are epitomized by the “check your personal life at the door” philosophy many firms have employed in the past. These relationships curtail trust.
Trusting relationships. These are relationships where we get to know enough about our team mates that we begin to see them as real people instead of people filling roles. These relationships build trust.
Why is it hard? Getting to know somebody requires an emotional investment. We are putting ourselves out there. And, whenever you put yourself out there, you run the risk of getting hurt. The other person is also putting themselves out there. And, frankly, they have a lot more on the line than you do. Transactional relationships are emotionally cheap and safe. Trusting relationships are emotionally expensive and risky.
Why should you care? Without trust, your existing superstars will end up leaving. New people who sniff out this culture will leave faster. You will end up with a firm full of people who like transactional relationships. And these people will hold your firm back in this post-Covid era. Expect client problems. Expect teaming problems.
The post-Covid era is rapidly approaching. Firms that encourage transactionally based relationships will no longer be able to compete for the best professionals, the best projects, or the best clients.
