When somebody is doing the mental calculus as to whether to join your team, one of the metrics they are using is the PITA factor. As in, how much of a pain-in-the-ass are you going to be as a leader. Since we are in an unabashed employee’s job market, the weight of this metric has increased in recent years. PITA is not only reserved for what you do. It is also broadcast in what you are not doing. Superstars don’t want to join teams that are led by turkeys (not referencing real turkeys here), they want to join teams that are led by other superstars. Yes, you offer a salary. Yes, you offer benefits. Yes, you have nodded in the general direction of creating the right culture. But, other organizations do this too–organizations that are competing for that superstar you have in front of you. What to do? Well, there’s a lot of meat on that bone (getting back to turkeys). One thing I would suggest: Start talking about how their role fits into the larger story. We work because we get something out of it. Something more than just money and benefits. We want to be a part of something larger than ourselves. We want to feel like we matter, that our work matters. Speak to that larger story and then put their potential work in the context of that larger story.